Knowing
by unexpecteddreamz
Summary: It's inescapable! Painful knowledge coming from deep within your shattered heart. How could it come to this? Of all the things you might have expected to see, this was the last.
1. Chapter 1

It's inescapable! Painful knowledge coming from deep within your shattered heart. How could it come to this? Of all the things you might have expected to see, this was the last. It might well be the last thing you ever see, his eyes looking into yours as one of you dies.

It's alway a means to an end. A way to make things right. Maybe it's just the road to Hell because it's paved with good intentions. The end can't always justify the means, the sacrifice, the sheer gall to always think that only the goal he percieves matters.

Don't the three of you matter at all? Years you have looked and listened and waited, and this is what you find at the end of it all? Things so broken that no amount of caring can glue it back together.

There was at least a litte hope until you saw that thing on his arm. You know that it will destroy you all. Brother will be pitted against brother as it was the first time. As it has always been. And you won't stand aside but in between. Even when you reach the end of this final mistake. You can't, won't let him go to that dark abyss after having destroyed his only family, his brother.

So, call your followers and give your instruction. They think you will lead them to victory. You can't let them see the truth, eventually they must learn to live without following. Find it in themselves to know what to do.

Only you know that you'll never see the end of their struggle, because your death will be the only thing standing between his soul and the pit. Always willing to bleed for the Winchesters, always willing to die for the brothers that need each other even more than they know.


	2. Chapter 2

Dean

Your brother and the angel. You know you need them with every atom of your being. So why are you walking away? What is happening to push them so far from you? It should bother you more, the thought of losing them.

Use the weapon, destroy the enemy. That's what your life has always been about. Now is no different than any other time in your life. Always the good soldier. That's all you have ever been. Kill the monsters, mercy is for the weak. What did you just think? No, that can't be right!

Darkness is trying to surround you. Why does your brother stand in your way? No, he would never betray you. But didn't he say he would let you die? What is that if not betrayal? So many times he had lied to you. Hidden so much of his intentions. Forgivness you have given time and again and yet when he looks at you, there is no room in his heart for you. Hunting partners, not brothers. That's what he said.

Always taking all you are willing to give. You won't give this up. This feeling of being right and powerful. Your hand aches for the return of the touch of the blade. With it in your grasp, all will be destroyed. Destroyed? Are you the destroyer? Yes, the thought feels right as it settles inside your mind.

The angel, your friend, will he stand in your way? The way he looked when he touched your arm, raised your sleve. When you finally wield the blade, even he won't be able to stand against you. What are you thinking? He is never to be harmed. He is a part of your soul. A part that is being filled by the darkness. He must not be allowed to distract you from your goal.

There is a great act of evil from the beginning that calls to you. It speaks to you of the death of all who stand against you. No matter who they may be. In your nightmares you see yourself wielding the blade as you send them both to their deaths. Your hands are covered in blood, their blood! Why don't the nightmares bother you any more? Who are you becoming?


	3. Chapter 3

"Look after him." The angel says. You nod your head in agreement. You wish he could come with the two of you. Maybe then he could help you figure out what is going on in your brothers mind.

You can't get the angels' worried look out of your thoughts. Does he know something you don't? He would tell you, wouldn't he? Or is he keeping secrets again to "protect Dean"? Yeah, right, like secrets ever work out for you three.

You know Cas would die in a heartbeat for him, or for you. Often he acts as if he thinks he knows your brother better than you do. Then again, maybe he does. They do share a strong 'profound bond' that you used to kid Dean about.

God, you miss the ability to joke with him like you used to. There are no more shared smiles. No easy way of knowing what the other is feeling. So much seems to be missing now.

You have erected a wall between brothers and can't seem to bring it down. You wish that you didn't feel so betrayed by what he did.  
He should understand why what he did was wrong. He will eventually. Right? When he does it won't be too late to repair the damage to your relationship. Will it? It's not like he hates you. Your brother loves you.

Dean would never harm Cas or you. Of course not... Okay, so maybe, lately you don't really understand your brothers increased bloodlust. If he seems so much more vicious killing monsters that's not really a bad thing. Not really. No... not at all. Of course not...

Why does that idea make you so uneasy?

There are so many questions and doubts that swirl around in your mind. It make you fear that not knowing or even knowing the answers may lead to the same place.


	4. Chapter 4

_**There are rules**_. Serious rules that he's not allowed under any circumstances to disobey. No way around it, or over, or under. Absolutely can't interfere. Nope, not at all.

Of course when had he _**ever**_ let that stop him from making sure others recieved what they deserved?

First, there was tall, brooding and oblivious to consider. What would bring him back to his touchy feely self in time to save the trio and incidentally, his own life. How to get his attention on the right nuances of his brothers actions, Hmm,something from before perhaps.

Second, there was the eldest Winchester. Was all the man knew self-sacrifice and self-loathing? His own lack of self worth could destroy them all. Where was the rope that could pull him back from this path he had chosen, erronously thinking he was destroying only himself.

And of course, can't forget the angel with the blue eyes and perpetually confused head tilt. The poor fool was once again ready to throw himself in front of (actually this time it was in between) the Winchesters to protect them. There was a way to save him _**if**_ the rules were broken.

Screw the rules! He never played by them before so why start now. Watching those three fools stumble around trying to see who could die, yet again.

So, with just a little expenditure of grace he reached back in time and retrieved an item from a motel room trashcan. Gently, this had to be done so as not to disturb the balance of power in the air. (Can't have angels or Him noticing.) Now, to bless the item and place where it will do the most good.

On Earth, in the bunker asleep on his bed Sam Winchester reaches out in his sleep and grasps a horned amulet on a cord that suddenly appeared on around his neck. Due to a small glamoure he won't even notice it's reappearance until it's needed. Until then he will hold onto the one thing that may save all three of them. The item that will show his brother that the love between them is more powerful than even Hell's power can destroy.

Yep. Gabriel decides it's worth the risk of breaking a few of his fathers rules. Dad should _**know**_ him well enough by now not to be suprised that his trickster angel will find a way.


End file.
